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Art, Baby, degenerative disc disease, Disability, Family, fibromyalgia, Future Plans, Hypermobility, Mobility Issues, My Life

It’s Amazing How Things Change

I’ve been absent from this page for a few months.  But a lot has happened in those few months.  I I look back at my life even just 8 months ago, I cannot believe the change.

In late June/early July, I was feeling pretty under the weather.  My get up and go have gotten up and gone, and my appetite had gone wonky.   I went on holiday to Whitby the last week in June, so I put it down to being tired out by my holiday.

 

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Whitby:  My Favourite Place in the World

I picked up after a while, but things were still not quite right.  And then all of a sudden I realised… I was late, and I’m not talking late for work.    I had my contraceptive implant taken out in March, and my husband and I had been trying for a baby ever since.  So I did a test and… It was positive!  I really hadn’t expected for things to have happened so quickly to be honest, heck, with my disability I almost expected for it to never happen at all.  But no, it has happened, and as of the time of writing this, I am 8 weeks +4 pregnant (though I haven’t had my dating scan done yet, and my first midwife appointment is a few weeks away).

 

It’s early days, I know, but I am so happy this has happened.  I can’t wait to read to my child, I hope they love reading as much as I do!  I’m not sure how hard I will find this pregnancy.  I’ve already had a bout of Sciatica, but that was probably nothing to do with being pregnant, I made the mistake of bending over to try and pick something up, and nothing screws my back up like bending over too far.  I’m not suffering from Morning Sickness at the moment, but my appetite is very strange.  I’ve gone off Fish, and I can only eat small amounts at a time; I get full very quickly.  My sense of smell has gone haywire as well, and strong smells make me feel very nauseous.

 

The other big news is I have been accepted to do a BA (Hons) Graphic Design course.  I had been feeling lost since my plans of working in Hospitality Management went out of the window due to my disabilities, and my biggest regret has always been I didn’t go to University.   I had been doing some design work for Country Village Inns, and I realised that not only was I good at it, I really enjoy doing it.  I was pretty sure I couldn’t manage a full time degree at a local University and work, so i looked into distance learning courses, and found the perfect course for me through Arden University.  So I applied, and literally the day I found I was pregnant I was accepted on the course!  So it all seemed to happen at once.  Being a distance course, I can take up to 9 years to complete it, though I am hoping to do it in 3.

 

So I’ve got alot going on for me now.   I am under no illusion that this whole thing will be easy, but then all the best things never are.  But I am not going to let my disabilities dictate my life.

Blacksmithing, Forged in Fire, Future Plans

Plans For The Future

One of the things I have found hardest about my worsening disability has been watching my plans for the future go out of the window. I’d finally found something I was good at and was enjoying running a pub. I had plans; I was going to eventually run my own pub, where geeks and nerds like me could get together as well as football fans, and I’d be able to do things like having Mead as well as the usual wines and spirits. It was something to aim for. Somewhere like The Meltdown Bar in London, or The Quest Inn in York (which I am hoping will be funded and opening soon.

Now, all that has gone out of the window, what the hell am I going to do now? I enjoy the design and marketing work I still do for Country Village Inns, but what about the rest of the time? Well, hopefully, a few things.

The first thing the followers of my blog will have already have noticed; I’m getting back into my digital art. But I have other plans.

Forged_in_Fire

Continue reading “Plans For The Future”

A Song of Ice and Fire, Books, Game of Thrones, George R.R. Martin, Patrick Rothfuss, Reading

Do Authors ‘Owe’ You Anything?

This popped up on Facebook for me today.

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It’s not the first time I’ve heard of it, but the comments on the video, along with comments I have seen elsewhere got me thinking.  Do authors (or any other creator) actually ‘owe’ their fans anything?

Continue reading “Do Authors ‘Owe’ You Anything?”

Animals, Calvin and Hobbes, Heartbreak, Nature, Prosecco

A Real Life Calvin and Hobbes Moment

I grew up loving Calvin and Hobbes. It’s hard to believe now that the strip ended in 1995 because some of the strips are still totally relevant today. Sadly, today the relevant cartoon was heartbreaking.

There is a Calvin and Hobbes strip where Calvin finds a baby racoon injured on the ground.  He takes it in and keeps it warm, hoping that the little guy would pull through.  Sadly, the Racoon dies, leaving Calvin bereft.

This strip always left quite an impression on me, even as a kid when I first read it, but now as an adult, I can see even more how this is a very special story.  Cartoons about kids very rarely touch on the theme of death.  Whether you feel that it’s not appropriate for children, eventually kids have to understand about death, because none of us are getting out of here alive.

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I was always the kid who found injured birds and hedgehogs and brought them home hoping I could nurse them back to health.  They always died, but there was always hope.  And it seems at nearly 38 years old, I’ve never lost that hope.

I found this little guy pretty worse for wear in the extremely hot weather near my house (and close to some of the neighbourhood cats).

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I’m not sure what type of bird he was.  I’m pretty sure the local cats had been at him, and he was almost gone when I found him ( I love cats, but bloody hell they are sods at times).  He was only in my life for the shortest time, but he has broken my heart, just as those animals did as a child.  But I’m not going to stop hoping, because I dread to think what type of person I’d be if I did.  Because you never know, one day I might save one.

Now excuse me whilst I go look for prosecco.